Let me tell you about the greatest show on earth!

By Lisa A. Eramo

"Were you trying to be a trapeze artist?"

These were the first eight words that came out of an orthopedic doctor's mouth when my partner and I recently went to an urgent care center after she took a spill on the ice.

At least he had a sense of humor, I thought. That's more than I could say for most doctors I'd recently encountered.

And although my partner may have perhaps had a childhood vision or two of running off and joining the circus, she was most certainly not trying to test her acrobatic abilities at the time when she fell in front of a captive sidewalk audience. She'd actually been trying to avoid a huge patch of ice. And by doing so, she stepped into a seemingly shallow puddle only to find an extremely deep pothole inside.

She walked into our apartment soaking wet, tears streaming down her face, a damp and dirty Vera Bradley bag dangling off of her arm. Her knees were badly swollen and bruised, and she looked more shocked and stunned than anything else.

We waited until morning to go to urgent care because we wanted to first see whether her PCP could squeeze her in. As predicted, the answer was no, and off to urgent care we went.

After the comedian/doctor took some x-rays, prescribed some pain medication, and told my partner that what she really needed was to 'stay off the ice' (translation: don't leave your house until the spring) and 'take a vacation to a tropical island,' we were on our merry way, hobbling back out onto the ice skating rink that was the parking lot.

Ah, the joys of living in New England in January. I like to joke that this is the season when orthopedic doctors all over the region get together and throw a secret party, knowing that with every fall on the ice, every sprain, every broken leg comes a dollar (or several hundred) in the door.

This is the time when orthopedic doctors' phones ring off the hook with patients on the other end crying of pains and bruises and all sorts of ailments from ice-induced falls. This is the time when these doctors extend their hours to accommodate the crippled...when they earn the money that funds their summer vacations to Italy when the weather is warmer.

The next time you walk down an icy New England sidewalk, be cognizant of the 'performers' you see...the swirling male clowns in their business attire, the mothers carefully juggling a grocery bag in each arm, the students like trained monkeys gliding off to class--each performer with his or her own unique walk, slip, and fall...and an orthopedic doctor somewhere in the distance to cheer them on.