Old enough to know

By Lisa A. Eramo

Picture this: My partner and I are sitting on a bench in Hyannis enjoying a couple of tasty scoops of gelato. We had just spent three days and four nights in the gayest place on earth: Provincetown. We're feeling good. We're feeling proud. I've got one arm around her as we enjoy the sun and slight breeze. We're people watching. And little do we know, there's someone watching us as well.

"You're gay, right?" a 70-something year old man said as he shuffled closer to us and took the open seat next to my partner.

Having been out for nearly ten years, I'd never really been asked this question directly. Thus, I wasn't sure how to respond even though I obviously knew the answer.

"Yes," we both said simultaneously.

"Oh, it's ok. I knew you were gay," he continued. "I'd like to sit next to you two fine gay ladies," he added, leaning in to get a closer look at us as though we were two monkeys imported from a foreign country.

How could he know we were gay? Did my arm around my partner shout gay? Was it my plaid shorts? The way I licked my gelato?

My partner started to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. I could tell her laughter was part humor and part shock. She turned her head directly toward me so he wouldn't notice. I started laughing as well.

The guy was oblivious. "A lot of gay people come to the cape. I should know. I've lived here all my life," he continued, clearly unaware of the concept of personal boundaries.

My partner continued to laugh an uncomfortable laugh. I started to think about much I wished the guy would evaporate into the nice summer air.

I wanted to say, "Are you old?" Of course he would say yes. To that, I would respond "I thought you looked as though you had one foot in the grave!" But alas, I kept my mouth shut. I couldn't tell whether this guy was a completely loose canon. I half expected him to whip a bible out of his back pocket and then proceed to drag us to the nearest church and force us to repent our 'sins.'

"You two from around here?" he said, seeming to soak in the sun and revel in the fact that he had clearly provoked us.

My partner had gathered her composure. Being the interactive and jovial person she is, she responded "No, we live in Rhode Island," flashing a smile that seemed to invite more conversation.

I cringed.

"You staying here for long?" he asked, happy to finally be engaged in a dialogue.

"No, we're going back today," she said. By this time, she had begun laughing again.

I think the guy picked up on our drift. "Well, have a nice day," he said, standing to stretch his legs and look around as if to say, 'Has anyone else seen these two gay women here? I couldn't believe my eyes! They're sitting right here on this bench!'

My partner and I watched him walk back to his oversized pickup truck and drive away. Then we went back to enjoying our gelato.